PFLAG SERMON- Bill Stanhope

Hi, my name is Bill Stanhope. I have been a member of this congregation for over a year.   I have had the pleasure of getting to know many of you, yet not all of you.  And although I have met most of you, many of you do not know that I am gay. I want to tell you how wonderful it is to be accepted in a congregation in which I do not have to hide who I am. 

Gay people have truly have come a long way in the past 35 years.  In 1972, when I was a child in Oklahoma, it was a crime for people of the same sex to have intimate passionate relations, punishable by jail terms. During that time, my mother sensed that I might be gay, so she had me seek counseling.  That next year, in 1973, the American Psychological Association ruled that Homosexuality was no longer a mental illness.  At that time, my family stopped my counseling.  My mother being an open-minded Unitarian came to the conclusion that if I were gay, it was most likely genetic, and that since being gay was not an illness, there was no reason for me to be cured.

Although I knew I was gay from childhood, I really didn’t act on my sexual desires.  Before then, I hid my sexual identity by dating women.  I was involved in politics at the University of Oklahoma and ended up being elected the student body president.  Due to that position, I did not feel that being openly gay was an option.  At the end of my senior year, I was asked to run for the open State House seat which included the University of Oklahoma campus and surrounding neighborhoods. Instead of staying in Oklahoma and running for office, I moved to San Diego immediately after graduating.  Being true to myself was much more important than any political aspirations.

I adjusted to life in San Diego immediately. In each part of San Diego where I lived, my friends, associates, and neighbors were accepting and supportive.  And when my loving but nosey grandmother found out I was gay and outed me to my whole family, all of my family was there to support me.  Yet many of my friends in Oklahoma were not so lucky.  I have several friends whose parents disowned them upon finding out their children were gay.

Because most people do not automatically assume I am gay, I have not been the victim of much homophobia.  Although every once in a while, I will see, that although we have come a long way in the past 35 years, we still have a long way to go.  Last year, I went back to Oklahoma to so see my friend Joshua.  While there, I saw blatant reminders of how close-minded and bigoted so much of our country is.  “God Bless our troops, God Bless Bush, and God Bless America, except for liberals and the faggots in Hollywood” was one of the many hateful billboards that I saw driving from Oklahoma City to Ada. Then upon returning to my hotel in Oklahoma City, I read in the paper that the state legislature was debating a bill that would make it a crime for any public library to allow any minor to read or check out any materials that put homosexuality in good light.  If that bill passes, children would be banned from reading such books as The Color Purple and Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistle Stop Café.  Is that really much different than the book burnings of the Nazis?

Unfortunately, Oklahoma does not have the monopoly of homophobia.  Two springs ago, I was in a bar in Borrego Springs where I watched the Oscars after a long day hiking.  Instead of being awed by the glamour of the award presentations, I was shocked by the ignorance, hatred, and bigotry of the patrons. “If that f**cking faggot Brokeback Mountain wins, I am going to puke,” said a weathered cowboy.  As Ang Lee won the award for best director for Brokeback Mountain, I cheered defiantly, as the cowboy gave me dirty looks.  I know if the cowboy had been younger and stronger, he would have tried to pick a fight.  Later, when Hillary Swank presented Phillip Hoffman with the award for Best Actor in his portrayal of Truman Capote, a burly unkempt farmer’s wife with a large cross around her neck clapped her hands then clasped her cross and said, “thank God that homosexual Brokeback Mountain didn’t win”.  Little did this woman know that Truman Capote was homosexual.  These unenlightened people were so quick to spew their venom for a movie they hadn’t the courage to see, while clapping for a movie they obviously hadn’t seen and knew nothing about.  What upset me the most, is that I know that these homophobic people represent and giant segment of our society.

As I left the bar, I asked my friend: why are so many people so close-minded and hateful?  As I looked at the pick-ups and gas-guzzling SUVs in that parking-lot covered with “Praise Jesus” and “God Bless Bush” bumper-stickers, the answer to my question became obvious.  I am a religious person who has deep love and respect for the Christian tradition.  However, as I look back at the farmer’s wife clenching her cross, I realized that Christian fundamentalism is the cause of much homophobic hatred.   

Since we are in a church let me say this:  Jesus save me!! Please save me from your fundamentalist followers!!  As religious progressives, it is important for us to read and study the Bible and other religious texts.  After examining and reading the Bible thoroughly, I could only find a handful of passages that address the topic of homosexuality.  When we hear religious zealots quote Bible verses as justification for homophobia, please don’t let them get away with it!  Please point out that the Leviticus codes that they quote as a reason to hate and discriminate against gay people are the same codes that declare that the shrimp cocktail that the cowboy was eating in the Borrego bar, and the polyester-cotton blend sweatshirt that the farm wife was wearing are equally declared to be abominations.  Yet now, don’t most Christians eat shellfish and wear clothes of mixed fabrics?  And when these same people quote the verse from Paul in Romans 1:26, please point out that the same Paul in Ephesians 6:5 said that the slave should obey his master.  If you look further back in the Bible, in Exodus 21: verses 20-21, it says that it is OK for a master to beat his slaves.  In Leviticus 25: 44-46 says that slaves are the property of their masters and can be willed.  Then in Genesis 16 1-2, the Bible says that it is OK for a male master to rape his female slaves.  Now, 2000 years after Christ was nailed to the cross, aren’t the Bible’s bigoted references towards homosexuality as outdated as its antiquated support of slavery and the abuse of slaves?  “What did Jesus say about homosexuality?”  The answer is, “nothing.”  I wish Jesus could come back to earth. Yet I am afraid that if Jesus did, his so-called followers would demand that he be nailed to the cross a second time for preaching peace rather than war, forgiveness rather than vengeance, being non-judgmental rather than bigoted, and fostering love rather than hate.

I think that until people who call themselves “Christians” realize that the Bible is no longer a valid justification for homophobia, there will always be hatred of gay people in this country, and there will continue to be a need for such organizations as PFLAG to help dispel bigotry.  PFLAG, again, thank you for all you have done and for all that you do!

Thank you.